Ave kuba mnandi uma owesilisa ethatha isinqumo sokulobola isithandwa sakhe. Kuqhuma imikikizo kujabule imindeni nabazali. Basuke bejatshuliswa nawukuthi lowo olotsholwayo usuke esezoshada aye emzini wakhe kukhule umndeni.
Kodwa okungidumazayo kulezi zinsuku wukubona ukuthi abantu bayalotsholwa kodwa dololo ukushada! Ngiyazibuza ukuthi kanti basuke belotsholelwani? Uyazi nawe uma ungabala imicimbi yomembeso ngakini, bese ungitshela ukuthi ngemuva kweminyaka eyishumi bangaki abagcina beshada, ungavumelana nami ukuthi cha impela uba munye noma babe babili.
Angisayiphathi ke eyalaba abangaloboli nhlobo, umuntu athandane nengane yomuntu iminyaka ewu-10, baze bahlale ndawonye kodwa lutho ukulobola. Abanye baze babe nezingane ngambili, uma ungena endlini ungaze ufunge ukuthi bawumfazi nendoda kanti phinde, akukaze kuphume ngisho iqhude leli.
Ngakolunye uhlangothi, iningi labesilisa alisafuni ukulobola likhala ngokungaziphathi kahle nokuphuza ngokweqile kwabesifazane. Abanye besilisa kuvela ukuthi bake balobola kodwa kwangahamba kahle ngakho ke abasacabangi ukulobola futhi bathi le nto imosha imali. Abanye bagcina ngokuthuma abakhongi beyocela isihlobo esihle bese kuphela kanjalo, abanye bayaqhubeka baze babonelwe nezinkomo kodwa bagcine bengashadelwanga. Abanye bandla baqala bethanda ukulobola kodwa bame endleleni ngoba hhayi bandla abazali banawo lo mkhuba wokufuna ukuceba ngezingane zabo. Babize baqombole.
Ezinkundleni zokuxhumana nakhona iningi labesilisa elingaganiwe lithi impela alicabangi, abanye bathi bancamela ukuthenga iPolo kunokulobola. Abanye bathi bona bazidlela emhlambini. Bakhona nami engixoxe nabo ngalolu daba, omunye uthe yena uyasaba ukulobola ngoba uthando alusekho namhlanje sekubhekwa ukuthi unani. Omunye wathi yena uyafisa ukulobola kodwa amandla akanawo uphinde wathi yena ukholelwa ekutheni umfazi uyinkinga edingekayo.
Yize kunjalo kodwa basekhona abesilisa abalenzayo iqiniso kubantu babo babalobole babashade,sihlezi sibona nasezinkundleni zokuxhumana abantu belotsholwa bembeswa beshadana kumnandi kukuhle. Akusibo bonke abantu besifazane abangaziphethe kahle futhi abangeke bakwazi ukwakha umuzi. Enye inkinga esibhekene nayo ukuthi amajongo anamhlanje nawo asefuna ukondliwa, sikhule umfazi ebiza vele kodwa isintu sithi umfazi akaqedwa. Amajongo anamhlanje nawo asebheka ukuthi owesifazane unani ingakho ke izinga lokulobolana lishona phansi.
Sengivala nje mina ngithi uma usuqalile ukulobola umuntu, qeda phela nishade. Noma ngabe nishada kwaNdabazabantu uma ukhala ngokubiza komshado ngoba cha wona uyabiza. Kungcono nihlele kahle umcimbi womshado senindawonye kunokuthi nizalisane inqwaba yezingane egameni lokuthi nilobolene, kodwa dololo ukushada. Nabazali kumele bathi ukuxegisa bakithi, asingagugeli ezinsisheni ngenxa yobugovu babo. Uma ungakaze ugwilike, ngeke ugwilikiswe yilobolo lengane yakho. Musani ukuxosha abakhwenyana ngokubafuna izigidi zemali, nibafune nezibizo zamaTiles ezindlu zenu nani enihlulwa ukuwathenga.
Elawini likaMagumede sifisa ukugqugquzela abantu ukuthi baganane bashadane ngoba kumnandi ukuba nomuntu othembele kuyena owaziyo ukuthi niwa nivuka ndawonye. Yebo izinkinga zikhona njengoba siphila nje futhi ziyohlezi zikhona kodwa kumele sazi ukuthi umfazi uyinkinga edingekayo. Indoda engaganiwe noma engenaye umfazi isuke ingaphelele, zitholele uhlanyana/impempe yakho eyodwa enizozwana nayo uyilobole uyishade uqhubeke nempilo. Musa ndoda ukufuna ukufa uyikhehla elikhohlakele elingaganiwe elidla emhlambini.