SITHANDA singathandi ucansi novuthondaba kuyohlala njalo kungesinye sezikalo zokujula kobudlelwane obuqinile futhi nobuya phambili. Singakukhohlwa konke engizokusho, uma nje sikhumbule lokhu: Uqanduqandu locansi akulona ijoka lomuntu wesilisa. Ukufika kuvuthondaba akuwona umthwalo womuntu wesilisa.
Abantu abaningi besilisa banezinduku ezisesigamini eside ngokwanele.
Ucansi novuthondaba nokwenzeka emuva kokufika kuvuthondaba konke kuwuchungechunge lokulungelana kwemizwa namavungu ayo. Izigaba zocansi ziqala ekulangazeleleni kuye ekuvukelweni kuze uyothi cababa kulo uvuthondaba.
Iqiniso lithi abantu abaningi besifazane banezinkinga eziqala ekulangazeleleni ucansi kanti isikhathi esiningi umuntu wesifazane uba nezinkinga eziba ngamawele. Kanjani? Ngalokhu ngisho ukuthi yena akujwayele ukuba abe nenkinga eyodwa engaba ukuhalela kuphela; uma engahaleli lokho kuhambisana nokungavukelwa okanye kube engikubiza ngokuthi ukuvukelwa okuphundulekile, lokhu okuhambisana nomgudu wocansi ovele ungaswakami; uvele uzomele nje. Izifo ezinjengalezi zijwayelekile kubantu besifazane; lokhu okungenjalo kubantu besilisa.
Umuntu wesilisa isikhathi esiningi uba nenkinga yokungavukelwa okanye yokusheshe adubule, achame. Lezi zimo zizodwa ezingenhla zibeka ibhaxa eliwela kowesifazane ekufikeni kuvuthondaba kodwa uthola ukuthi kuba umuntu wesilisa ohlale othwele ijoka lokuthi uyehluleka ukufikisa lowo adlelana naye kuleli wozawoza elinoju eliwuvuthondaba.
Ake sibuke nasi esinye isimo: ukwenzeka kuhlanganisa induku okunye lokho okusebenzisayo ocansini ukuthi kuthinteke izindonga zonke zomgudu wesifazane kuhlanganisa namavungu emizwa athontelene ezindaweni ezehlukene emgudwini wocansi kowesifazane. Kodwa uthola ukuthi kuba nguye umuntu wesifazane oseyovula imilenze kakhulu ayithi gengelezi uma kuyiwa ocansini. Umbuzo uthi ivulelwani imilenze kangaka? Okanye kunamthelela muni ukuvula imilenze ngale ndlela? Lokhu kwenza kushiya induku yowesilisa okumele ithinte zonke lezi zindawo ezisemgudwini esengikhulume ngazo, isidwanguzela ngenxa yokuvuleka osekukhona; okwesibili ukuvula kakhulu kungenisa umoya ngaphakathi emgudwini. Yingakho uyaye uzwe umgudu wesifazane usubanga umsindo ongajwayelekile uma kuyiwa ocansini.
Asizibuze ukuthi kulula kangakanani ukufika kuvuthondaba uma sesithe gengelezi imilenze kwangena umoya mhlawumbe onamagciwane. Masikhumbule ukuthi umoya uwodwa nje udala ubuthuntu bokuhlangana kwezicutshana ngaphakathathi esingabudingi. Kwenzekani kuvuthondaba kulesi simo, ivulwe ngubani imilenze?
Ngokokulandela ukuthungelana kwemizwa, uma uphathina wakho ethi, ‘vula’ okanye ‘ngivulele kakhulu’ usuke echaza ukuthi ingathi ungaqinisa kule ndawo okuyo, ngizwa umkenenezo omtoti; bese kuthi ngenxa yokushodelwa ngamazwi kulesi simo aphimisele ngokuthi, ‘vula’.
Ake sibuyele endukwini, ngisho ucansi olumbandakanya induku; sisho phela ngoba ayiyodwa indlela yokuyiwa ocansini. Abantu besilisa abaningi banezinduku ezisesigamini eside ngokwanele. Lokhu sikuthathela ekuhloleni abantu besilsa, nasekukaleni ubude bezinduku kubona. Izinduku zeningi kwabesilisa ezingaphezu kuka-12.5cm, okuwubude obungaphezudlwana komgudu wesifazane ovukelwe, wona oba lapha ko-11.5cm.
Ububanzi benduku evukelwe bungaphezudlwana kuka 4cm. Lapha siyakwazi ukukukala lokhu ngokuzama ukufaka induku evukelwe kule ndingilizana eyiphepha kuyipheshana lokusula uma uye endlini encane. Akumelanga induku evukile ikwazi ukuzingenela kalula nje lapho. Leyo nduku iwusayizi olungile ububanzi. Induku engavukile ubude isukela ku-4.5cm kuya ku-9.5cm. Kuba kuphela uma induku ingaphansi kuka-4.5cm, lapho esithi khona lona wesilisa unenduku emfishane ngokwedlulele. Bancane kakhulu abantu besilisa abanenduku engaphansi kuka 4.5cm. Ngiyafisa sikhumbuzane ukuthi induku kowesilisa siyikala kusukela ethanjeni leli elingenhlana eduze kwenduku, asisuki esikhunjeni lapho ongathi iqala khona, wena uma ubuka nje. Angazi singakugcizelela kanjani lokhu kukasayizi wenduku, ngoba uma wesilisa engazikala uzothola ukuthi unothi unosayizi osesimeni, ngaleyo ndlela ukuzethemba kuyabuya induku izivukele ingabi nankinga. Lokhu ngikugcizelela ngoba ukulahlekelwa ukuzethemba kusho umjikelezo wokulahleka kokuvuka kwenduku okungenasidingo.
Abantu abaningi besilisa banenkinga yokusheshe bachithe, lena okuyinkinga elula kakhulu ukuyelapha. Okubalulekile kuvuthondaba ngumuntu wesilisa ozokwazi ukuvimba ukusheshe achithe isikhathi esanele ukuze umlingani afike kuvuthondaba. Ngiyafisa ukugcizelela ukuthi abesilisa mababuyise ukuzethemba, ukuze bangahambi benaleli joka lokuthi unenduku engavuki, kanti akunjalo; okulandelayo kuzoba ukulahlekelwa kwethuba lokuthi bafikisane kulobu bumnandi obungafaniseki obuyivuthondaba.
Mpilonde!
*Lolu daba lwashicilelwa kuqala ngo-04/09/2019