UKUBA wumzali wuhambo oluba mnandi ikakhulu kwabasuke bekuhlelele ukuba nabantwana, kodwa futhi kuyenzeka lube nezigigaba lapho lugqilaza khona emqondweni, emzimbeni nasemphefumulweni.
Lokho kushiwo ngabesikhungo sezempilo esizimele, i-Affinity Health, esidalule ucwaningo esisanda kulwenza olusivezele ukuthi abazali abaningi baba nenkinga yokubhekana nokuba wumzali okwenza bahaqwe yinkinga ebizwa phecelezi ngokuthi yi-parental burnout.
Iyini yona i-parental burnout?
Yisimo lapho umuntu ehlale ezizwa ekhathele emzimbeni nasemoyeni ngenxa yezinselelo zokuba wumzali. Umehluko phakathi kwalokho nokhwantalala olwejwayelekile wukuthi kukuhaqa isikhathi eside futhi kwenze ukuthi lowo osekumhaqile angabi namdlandla wokunakekela ingane noma izingane zakhe, okungenza ukuthi ubudlelwano bakhe nabo bungazinzi.
Ubona kanjani ukuthi unale nkinga?
1. Uhlale uzizwa ukhathele emqondweni nasemzimbeni: Lokhu yilapho uhlale ukhathele kangangokuthi ngisho ukade ulele ngokwanele, kodwa akubi namehluko.
2. Ukuqhelelana nabantwana bakho ngokomoya: Lokhu kwenzeka ngokuthi umzali afikelwe wumuzwa wokungakhathaleli umntwana wakhe ngendlela efanele ngaleso sikhathi, kuthi noma kuphambana imibono, angabi nendlela efanele yokuveza lokho kuyena.
3.Ukuhlale ukhathazekile futhi unesicanucanu: Yilapho umzali edinwa wubala nangento okungamele engabe imcasula kangako eyenziwe wumntwana wakhe, nokuthi ungakwazi ukumbekezelela uma kunokuthile okumhlulayo noma angakwenzi kahle.
4. Ukuzizwa usukwenyanya ukuba wumzali: Lana yilapho okuthi ubukade uzazi ukuthi uyamthanda umntwana wakho kodwa kuvele kushintshe esikhaleni, uzizwe ungasakuthakaseli ukuba wumzali, ubona sengathi umntwana wakho usewumthwalo kuwena.
5. Ukungazinaki: Yilapho ongabi naso isikhathi sokuzinakekela okungaba wukuzivocavoca, wukudla ngendlela efanele nokugxila ekwenzeni izinto ozithandayo. Lokhu kwenzeka ngokuthi umzali azame ngokweqile ukubeka impilo yomntwana wakhe phambili, angabe esakwazi ukuzinaka yena, okwenza kugcine kufika lapho ekhathala khona.
Idalwa yini le nkinga emuntwini?
- Ukungakwazi ukumela izinselelo zomsebenzi nokuba wumzali.
- Ukukhathazeka okudalwa wukungabi nayo imali yokufeza izidingo zakho zempilo.
- Ukuzizwa sengathi abekho abantu abakwesekayo ohambweni lwakho lokuba wumzali.
Ubhekana kanjani nale nkinga?
- Wukuvuma ukuthi unenkinga: Isinyathelo sokubhekana nale nkinga wukuqala uvume ukuthi unenkinga, futhi wamukele ukuthi ukugqilazeka kwakho kwangaleso sikhathi akusho ukuthi usuwumzali omubi ukwedlula bonke abazali abakhona emhlabeni.
- Beka eqhulwini ukuzinakekela: Ukuzinakekela wena uqobo kumqoka ngendlela efanayo nelinganayo nokunakekela abantwna bakho, ngakho kungasiza ukuthi ukhuthalele ukwenza izinto ezahlukene eziwukuzinakekela okungaba wukuzivocavoca, wukuzindla noma uhambe nje, ushaywe wumoya.
- Ukucela usizo: Ungesabi ukuxhumana nabangani, umndeni noma umeluleki oqeqeshelwe ukukusiza uma kukhona okukudingayo okungaba wukulekelelwa wumuntu ozokugadela ingane.
- Zibekele imigomo kodwa ungazixini: Akekho umzali ongcwele noyohlale enza izinto ngendlela efanele, ngakho yamukela ukuthi ngeke ukwazi ukwenza yonke into emhlabeni oyifisela umntwana wakho, ukusiza ukuthi ungazifakeli ingcindezi engenasidingo. Gxila kokubalulekile nonamandla nendlela yokukwenza ngaleso sikhathi, futhi unganqeni ukwedlulisela okunye kwabanye abazokusiza ukugwema ukuzixina.